Overcoming the Dark Side of Leadership: The Codependant Leader

The Biblical character is Samson, he was a man with a need.

They are:
• Peacemakers who cover up problems rather than face them
• May have high tolerance for deviant behavior
• Willing to take on more work so they do not have to tell anyone no
• React rather than act
• They are repressed and frustrated people who cannot give full expression to their emotions or problems

Mark the following:
5 = strongly agree
4 = agree
3 = uncertain
2 = disagree
1 = strongly disagree

• I grew up in a family with one or more chemically dependent people (i.e., alcoholics, drug addicts, etc.).
• I grew up in a strict, legalistic religious environment that held its members to an unrealistic standard of behavior and discouraged open communication about personal struggles and problems.
• I am usually willing to put up with the bizarre or embarrassing behavior of others.
• I often refrain from sharing my opinion in a group setting until I have heard the opinions of the others in the group.
• I frequently worry about hurting people’s feelings by sharing my true feelings.
• I often feel responsible for problems I did not create.
• I find it difficult to sleep because I worry about someone else’s problems or behavior.
• I find myself frequently over-committed and feel my life is out of control.
• I find it extremely difficult to say no to people even when I know that saying yes will result in difficulty for me or my family.
• I constantly feel a sense of guilt but have difficulty identifying its source.
• I feel like I never measure up to those around me and have self-deprecating thoughts.
• When I receive compliments from others, I find it difficult to simply accept them without making qualifying statements.

Next Week: The Passive-Aggressive Leader